DoubleButterNipples

When your state is close to being the next Indiana, you have two options:

1. Perhaps try and fix the state.

2. Trick people into visiting it, and when they are disappointed, it is already too late. You have their money. (more…)

This is the reason why I don’t have advertising on my site. I prefer straight forward advertisements as opposed to beating around the bush(or the lack of one in the case of this ad). I really have no choice but to continue my war against advertisements that refuse to tell you what they’re ultimately saying: (more…)

You know, I hate getting bothered on the street, and what bothers me the most is its usually Greenpeace. People are getting hit by cars crossing the street prematurely to avoid a conversation with them. Therefore, they are doing more harm than good. (more…)

If you haven’t heard, there’s something of a recession going on. People have been pointing fingers but their already outstretched fingers have been pointed in all the wrong places. They look to people in the CEO positions and assume it is a result of their careless spending. They then turn their accusing eyes and hate-filled skin flaps they call a face towards corruption even though they probably have no idea what that word even means. They just want something to take the blame so they can burn it at the stake and feed it to bears. If that is you, then I have good news for you then. I know what caused the collapse. (more…)

I still…don’t have my answer.

On December 2nd, 2008, a very pissed off person posted a resume on craigslist in hopes of getting a job and a legion of people online telling me how great I am…oh how the latter was sweet.  That person was most certainly not Jack Cleary, but me.  I posted it with the notion that the majority of my claims were indeed false(with the exception of my claim to have watched Juwanna Mann 18 times…I actually did).

The last three days, I have had two dreams that were frightening, but ultimately cool as fuck.  These dreams were about the end of the world, and they weren’t as creepy until I looked back at my resume almost a year ago and realized that I have predicted that I would be able to have prophetic visions of the apocalypse. And now, I can. (more…)

Are you fucking tired of FML?  For all the uncultured swine out there, FML stand for “fuck my life”.  They have a whole website devoted to instances where people get down on their knees and beg the world to bask in their failures.  Most of these instances are probably made up, and I have seen a few that don’t warrant a post on Fmylife.  Not because they are too bad but because some instances are worse than life fucking, some are like having a giant pair of balls park their flesh pocket right on your face, which is….in my opinion…worse than death. (more…)